The Postal Club · House Notes
A few quiet words,
before you write.
How to exchange addresses with new pen pals sensibly — a short, practical guide written by the people who run The Postal Club.
House rule
The Postal Club does not store your home address. Not in your profile, not in our database, not anywhere. You share it only when you choose to, directly with a pen pal, in a private message.
Chat first, share later.
Exchange at least three or four private messages with a potential pen pal before sharing your address. It gives you a chance to get a sense of them — their tone, their patience, how they write — and it quietly filters out the people who are not here for the slow, letter-writing life. There is no hurry. Letter writing is a slow hobby by design.
Consider a PO box for your first exchanges.
Many letter writers use a PO box or a commercial mailbox service instead of a home address, at least with newer pen pals. If trust grows over the months, you can choose to share your home address later.
Royal Mail in the UK, USPS in the United States, and most postal services worldwide offer a PO box at modest cost. It is a small, considered investment in your peace of mind — and it keeps your home yours.
Never share your address in public posts.
Share addresses only in private messages, and only with people you have chosen to write to. Never in the activity feed, a group, a comment, or anywhere a stranger might see it.
If you notice another member sharing their address in public, please quietly tell us. We will help them delete it.
Trust your instincts.
If a potential pen pal pressures you for your address, asks unusual personal questions, pushes for a quicker pace than you are comfortable with, or says anything that makes you feel uneasy — you do not owe them a letter. It is absolutely fine to politely stop replying, or to block them. No explanation needed.
— Your gut is usually right.If something goes wrong, we are here.
If a member behaves inappropriately towards you, please report them using the report link on their profile, or write to us directly. We read every message. We take every report seriously. You are not making a fuss.
Write to the community manager
If you need to tell someone, tell us.
Any concern about another member, any question about the guide above, anything you would like a human to look at — we read everything that arrives.
info@thepostalclub.comWe usually reply within a day. Often sooner.
Letter writing is a slow, beautiful, trust-building act. Taking your time with address exchange is entirely in the spirit of the hobby.
— The Postal Club